I lost a good friend last week. Don't be sympathetic, its not like she died. She moved away and had no use for me anymore. I considered us best of friends, that is why she was my maid of honor at my wedding. I valued our friendship. I expected us to be friends for many many years. She even got together with my chidhood best guy friend (something that only happens in movies)... They make a good couple...I imagined their wedding, and our children being friends...
I am rather distraught over the whole ordeal. It makes me feel sick. I can only imagine what sort of stories she creates to turn people/her friends against me. As if it was a war. I am sure there are a handful of people out there that are convinced I am a man stealing (remember, I am happily married), attention hungry, bully that used her to better myself. Same thing she told me about some of her other used-to-be-friends. What really confused me was her reasoning for her ending our friendship... the reason why changed with each email... Then everything made since, she was just trying to get rid of me like the others... I could use this sliver to cyber space to tear apart this girl. To defend myself against her antics. To trash talk her and create lies to make her look bad... but I just can't do that. She was my friend and I loved her.
I did learn quiet a bit from her though. She taught me to be brave. To smile when life is a drag. She taught me that I don't have to appease everyone. To take bubble baths with candles and a good book. She taught me that it is alright to be angry. How to make life interesting and always fun.
I am thankful for my poor memory. I tend to block the bad things in my life, and I am already forgetting the painful conversations that took place this last week. Soon alls that will be left are the amazing memories of the crazy adventures my friend and I experienced. So in my world that is where I will keep her... Somewhere between Ozzfest, driving home from San Diego, and throwing playground balls at monkeys in the gym...
So Daniel and I will be leaving for Arizona on the 10th (of next month... October)... It is less than two weeks away. I am not scared anymore. My parents are already talking about "when they come visit in two months or so" I am more then ready to move... well... other then packing... which I hate to do... hate with a passion... I would rather get a tooth pulled them pack... you get ice cream with dentist visits... you only get paper cuts from packing....
For the last two week I have boycotted cleaning. It isn't going as I planned. Daniel and I live with another couple who don't seem to see the need to share household responsibilities. I am not the only one who uses the toilet or shower... But Daniel has ended up picking up the slack, because he is just sweet like that. It isn't fair to him, so I will have to cave in... no more roomates... never again...
I have found a old friend... I just love when that happens... she is just as I remembered her... charming, bubbly and very talkative.. and now she has my living room furniture... that's kinda funny to me... I hadn't seen her for ten years or so... myspace is awesome ...
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