Monday, June 30, 2008

pregnant mind

Sometimes it's hard to see the positive aspects of life when you start heading towards rock bottom.

It seems like Daniel and I have been challenged so much in our life together. I thought it couldn't get any worse after going through a few lost pregnancies then a bankruptcy.

Those were very dark times.

I know, for a fact, that we could not have made it without the support of our families and a few great friends. Daniels family opened their door for us when we moved there. His sister gave me a spectacular job. Corbin gave us a fun adventure in his house when we wanted a bit more privacy. Then my parents literally came and picked us up and brought us back to Redding.

Daniel and I were hit with a ton of bricks today. We thought things were going pretty good, but it looks like our life in our little house is going to be short lived. On top of that, we are going to loose our vehicle (and my computer has a STD and is down for the count). I will admit I am beyond stressed out. There is nothing like being 7 months pregnant, on restricted activities, but have to pack up a house (I just unpacked) and find some other place to live. I would love nothing more to just settle in a nice place and live a life. We simply can not afford the accommodations we have now.

We sat across from each other at dinner tonight and just stared at one another. Trying to think of things to be thankful for. I must admit it was hard. Then I realized that just having Daniel in my life is a great blessing. I am extremely thankful for him. Which made me think of my little baby boy, who is healthy and kicking harder and harder ever day. I am very thankful for my son and the fact that God has blessed me with a healthy pregnancy.

Then my perspective changed. I looked down at my dinner and realized, we are not starving. We just had a filling dinner. We are not naked, we are wearing nice clothes. Daniel has a great job. We have medical insurance now... AND cheese, milk, peanut butter, juice, eggs and cereal thanks to WIC...

I then looked out the window and saw a man with no teeth. Then realized we are not completely unfortunate looking. This made me laugh inside... I am so shallow...

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