Tuesday, August 19, 2008

Start of a crackhead career

So Daniel and I went apartment hunting today

The pickings are slim to none.

The first apartment we looked at was over by Enterprise High... We were excited because it was "move in ready" and we only have 11 days left to find a place. The curb appeal was nothing to gawk over. It didn't look too promising, but wasn't bad either. Upon entering the unit we cringed at the brown carpet that was splattered with pink and green paint. We then noticed the walls which had no paint what-so-ever... just a nice shade of primer. The kitchen was the first "room" we checked out. The linoleum once could have been nice, but it was hard to tell with all the dents, dirt and grime build up in the corners. There was nice counter space and plenty of cupboard room. The oven and the fridge looked farley new on the outside. I almost lost my lunch when I opened the fridge though... blood... everywhere... all over the inside of the fridge. We proceeded down the hall where we saw the remains of a heater unit... I think it exploded. The wall around it was charred brown and black. We then came to a door... err... plywood separator with a door-knob... I pushed open the make-shift door and find more blood all over the "newish" linoleum that had been laved but not cut to fit. Where the baseboard was suppose to meet the floor to the wall was missing and the linoleum was heading up the walls. The tub was fine... it actually looked clean. As well as the sink... We left the bathroom and went across the hall to a bedroom. This room had a make-shift door as well... The room looked fine. A nice window and standard size closet all complemented by nail polish glittering the brown carpet. There were no outlet coverings on the walls or light cover for the bulb sticking out of the ceiling. Down the hall was the "mater bedroom". It also had the charming nail polish carpet, absent light fixtures and door, as well as a community of cob webs in the corner.

We then left this charming duplex.... I should have brought a camera; it would have been more amusing.

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