I am curious to understand why God is constantly putting me through periods of waiting... I do feel like I am a patient person. I wait on God knowing he will give me my hearts desire.
This last week I spent with my stomach in knots. Is this baby surviving? Thursday morning was spent in the Emergency room, some unexpected (and painless) developments had my entire family on their knees. This moment was why Daniel and I choose to spread the good news so early. We couldn't possibly endure heartache alone. The constant support of our family is the only thing keeping us sane.
The Emergency room doctor gave us a report of gloom and doom after only doing a basic ultrasound... "there is nothing you can do, sometimes these things just happen"... To which I wanted to slap him! Yes, these things happen... maybe once in a woman's life... NOT FOUR TIMES! Don't be such a pompous prick Dr. Curly Fro... geez I hate Mercy Medical Center!
My OB, Dr. Perry, once again went above and beyond in examining every detail then explaining it to me. He then showed me that not all is lost... showed me the positives and remind me that God is in control. I went in today to have more blood work done then tomorrow I go see Perry to discuss it... to find out the outcome... but for today... I wait on God.
I have never been more scared in my life. Never have I been more exhausted. The emotional drain these last few days have left very little left of me to be a mommy. I feel like a Zombie...